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“DRINK THE BLACK SPERM OF MY VENGEANCE”

When I first saw DOLLS way back in 1970 it was John Lazar as “Z-MAN” who had all the great lines. His was the persona that best represented just how far out this film could be!. This character was so over the top in terms of performance, especially armed with Roger Ebert’s faux mix of Shakespearean verse with 60’s hip phraseology, that it was understood John Lazar was the “Man”…..it was his happening and it freaked us all out baby!!

As with my recollections of MYRA I was fortunate to know on rather personal terms the directors of both films as well as cast members, some of whom became clients during my time as an agent.

Unlike Calvin Lockhart or Monty Landis, my experiences with John Lazar were decidedly not positive, so naturally it never occurred to me to write about them until this column began to take an autobiographical turn last year. The majority of my adventures with the cult figures of Hollywood have been fun, some more than others, and yes! There have been situations where I wished I had kept my naiveté regarding how certain actors can be so unlike their screen personas. Sometimes it is better not to meet those you admire on the screen because they can bite you.

After the Meyer interview I felt compelled to meet the rest of the cast of Russ’s own personal favorite of his films, BEYOND THE VALLEY OF THE DOLLS. Originally I asked Russ if he had a phone number or a way I could meet John Lazar…I recall asking why this obviously talented man never made more films or, more to the point, whatever happened to John Lazar? Russ said at the time he did not know how to reach John and had been out of touch after casting him in his last film, ULTRA VIXENS.

For the record Russ Meyer never said anything negative about John Lazar as a person or as an actor. Russ always felt that the very nature of the character forever typed John in a category where he would never work again. Russ would say ‘I ruined that guy’s career!”

That character ‘Ronnie Barzel’ known to all BVD fans as ‘Z-MAN’, who behaves in the film like a gay man then abruptly reveals he is really a hermaphrodite who likes to dress as “Superwoman.” Once in this pseudo Wonder Woman attire ‘she’ devotes the better part of last reel of BVD beheading the object of her desires ‘Jungle lad,’ AKA Lance Rock (Michael Blodgett) to the fanfare of the 20th Century Fox theme music! Once you saw that performance you were never likely to forget it.

So what really happened that prevented the actor who could conjure up such a performance from never making more than a handful of films? Other gender bending performances come to mind like Tim Curry in ROCKY HORROR or Chris Sarandon in DOG DAY AFTERNOON where talent is recognized regardless of the role that brought that actor to your attention, sometimes even establishing a career. Consider Boris Karloff in FRANKENSTEIN. Well… I was about to find out the answer to this question in spades

This brings us to 1995 and preproduction for a film called NIGHT OF THE SCARECROW. One of my good friends is director Jeff Burr who shares my love of old movies and the people who made them. Jeff is very talented not to mention a great guy with a big heart. Jeff was also the director of the aforementioned film. One afternoon I get a call from Jeff asking me to meet him at Café Figaro on Melrose which was at the time a couple of blocks from my then-apt in Beverly Hills. Jeff had a surprise waiting for me there. The great Z-Man himself was sitting at a table with Jeff waiting to be introduced to his number one fan! Jeff was prepping a film and John was very interested in being a part of it. We had a super time together sharing anecdotes about films in general and BVD in particular. I left the restaurant knowing I had made a new friend.

For nearly a year John Lazar was enjoyable to be around. By then I had met his wife and three kids who lived in the valley. John was really concentrating on his craft, working out, taking classes. At this time Jeff had given John the part of the warlock who curses the town in the film’s flashback explaining why it all had to be and so on… It was a small role, not more than a cameo. John had auditioned for the larger part of the scarecrow killer, however he was cast in the cameo instead. This was most likely the beginning of his problems with Jeff Burr. John had prepared a scene from Macbeth to secure the scarecrow role. I remember him calling me afterwards thinking he had just blown everyone away with his reading. This should have been a warning all was not well, but at the time I just wrote it off to an actor’s ego tripping. John was an expert swordsman and should have been teaching fencing for the movies. I suggested on several occasions that this could be a very lucrative second career and would have also taken some of the pressure off his wife in supporting the children. During the filming I got a call from John who was irate because Jeff wanted to film him semi nude at one point in an orgy sequence where, according to John, you could see his ass. This was a breach of contract to John, who wanted me to step in and do something. Looking back it was beyond absurd, as John wound up showing his ass to everybody in any case!

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